How Jordan Reid Can Inspire Women In And Out Of Hollywood

I’m not really a fan of it’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. I know plenty of people who are, but it’s just never been my cup of tea. I think everyone involved in it is really talented and funny — especially Charlie Day — and all that, it’s just not my kind of humor.

I mention this because, a bunch of years ago, I was bartending at this place in the East Village, when a friend came by for a drink and brought in a friend with her. She introduced me to Jordan Reid, who was smart and lovely and very impressive. I remember how bubbly she sounded when telling me of her recent engagement as the three of us shot the breeze on a nice summer evening in New York and I refilled their wine glasses.

It didn’t take long for Jordan to ask me if I watched It’s Always Sunny. I admitted I had seen a few episodes, but that it hadn’t done much for me, and wondered aloud why she asked.

“Because the blonde in it was originally me,” she said.

She proceeded to tell me an abbreviated tale of woe about an actress who had been screwed out of real success by an ex-boyfriend and her friends, and how the guys who were credited with creating the show, a show she had a real hand in putting together, were rich and famous and had achieved all the things she once wanted to achieve.

I remember there wasn’t a whole lot of bitterness to the tale. On the contrary, my recollection is that she had a sense of humor about it. One of those things that happen in Hollywood, y’know? After all, she was now with a guy she loved and was thinking of doing some writing. Or maybe she had already started writing, I can’t be a hundred percent sure. Either way, she seemed like she was in a good place, and when she left the bar, I recall being impressed by how she carried herself, and then didn’t really think about it or her ever again.

Until a couple days ago, when I stumbled upon a new blogpost Jordan had written, refining and adding a lot of detail to the story I’d heard almost a decade ago. It all came instantly back, and as I read the post, I was incredibly affected by her take on events that had happened a dozen or so years back, when she was young and scared and made the mistake of trusting her friends, who were as desperate for success in a difficult business as she was.

Essentially, while she was living with Rob McElhenney, she helped him, Day, and Glenn Howerton develop the show and originally played the role that would ultimately be filled by Kaitlin Olson. Even though she had been integral in creating it, as her relationship with Rob ended, it was made clear to her that, if she broke up with him, she would be off the show.

She broke up with him anyway. Jordan writes, “I can’t tell you how many people have asked me why I didn’t just stay in the relationship until the show was picked up and my contract was set in stone.”

Wow. Really? We think so little of ourselves and a woman’s place in society and in Hollywood that we automatically expect someone to debase herself, to continue to sleep with someone she didn’t want to be sleeping with anymore, for money and fame and success? None of which, by the way, were guaranteed? The fact that the first reaction of so many was that she should have done it is sort of appalling.

She essentially exonerates the three guys for screwing her over — and, at the same time, is exceedingly gracious towards Olson — and if she can let them off the hook and understand why they did what they did, I certainly can’t do any differently. I can’t honestly say I wouldn’t have done the same thing if I had been in that situation, so, if it’s good enough for her, it’s good enough for me.

But while that’s a nice epilogue to the story, it’s not what’s really important here. For starters, Jordan says she is really happy now, which is great. She also says that one of the reasons why she’s writing this again is because she has a daughter of her own and it’s important to teach her little girl that using sex as a weapon is wrong. She also talks about how she wishes she could go back in time and talk to her 23-year-old self — the same girl who was scared into silence because she thought she would lose her job if she made some noise, and then ended up losing her job anyway — but, while she can’t do that, she can do something else.

She can talk to all the 23-year-olds out there now. Not just in Hollywood or some other part of the entertainment business, but all of them, wherever they are. The teenagers and twenty-somethings and thirty-somethings, too. Anyone and everyone should read this, because the central tenets of her post — to be brave, to speak up in the face of injustice, to demand what is deserved and that no one should be allowed to harm you or your career for reasons of any kind — are universal.

And yeah, it’s really easy for me to say this, but that’s why I think this should be required reading for everyone. Men have a responsibility to speak up when they see this happening, and do something about it. As my colleague Anya reminded me, there is a unique discrimination that takes place with a woman when it comes to power dynamics. She’s right. We can call it out as much as we like, but if we don’t actually do anything about it, we’re as guilty as the one who is actually doing the discriminating.

The depressing thing about this story is that it is not remotely unique. It happens all the time, every day, in every city, every industry. While there is more awareness now than there ever was, not enough is being done to stop it. We can always do more, and it wouldn’t cost so much — not just in dollars, but in energy and intentions — to do so.

If you think this kind of thing is overblown or unrealistic, click that link above and read Jordan’s piece. You know what? Do it anyway, even if you don’t think that way. Then share it with others. Maybe, if enough people see it, it will start to make a difference. That might be wishful thinking, but these days, especially these days, it’s definitely something worth wishing for.

Neil Turitz is a filmmaker and journalist who has spent close to two decades in the independent film world and writing about Hollywood. Aside from being a screenwriter/director and Tracking Board columnist, he is also a senior editor at SSN Insider.